In blog 15, I talked about faith, belief, and hope and why it almost always seems delusional but is the only rational thing to do. Consider it the preface of this blog.
And I still stand by that quote of my blog. In fact, I wanted to add to it and strengthen that truth.
Hope is the only rational thing to do. But why?
This week, Unknowingly I went through a phase. I don’t suggest anyone trying to artificially simulate this phase though, without enough wisdom you might get trapped in it. However I just realized since you’re reading this, I don’t think that’ll happen even if you try.
“You should have seen your face,” said my mother, ” Looked like a person under depression,” said my sister.
Well, I’ll tell you how I felt. I think I had hit the most low level of hope, like the absolute zero temperature, this seemed like the absolute zero hope zone. And in that state, the only thing you feel is emptiness. Your mind is clear like an animal’s, literally no thoughts passing by. I was surprised to experience this because my brain is usually busy with one or the other thought until I instruct otherwise. And your entire belief system somehow is absent. You no longer believe anything, not even the most strongly held beliefs you had, even the ones that your entire life’s meaning lies on its support. And time doesn’t matter anymore, you could spend hours sitting doing nothing. To listen to, it might seem it’s like a spiritually enlightened state, but it’s not.
My takeaways :
- The universe is designed in such a way that you cannot live without hope. Either you are pulled back to living a life with hope or you may hastily decide to commit suicide. Either way, there won’t be a long time when you’re out of hope. It almost seems like life, the dimension of time is intertwined with hope.
- When you feel free of hope, it’s likely that one of the causes may be that you felt like you were an anomaly, that is, you feel the universe doesn’t care for you, your thoughts, emotions, and you feel your actions don’t affect the universe either. Because as I said, hope is intertwined with life, once you’re detached from it, I think it’s natural to feel that way because you’re essentially being unnatural, you’re acting like how an anomaly would. But the key to getting out of the anomaly problem is, at least for me it was ( and as always, it is awareness, as my chosen path is the path of knowledge, I see and receive it everywhere, and probably for you it is different), to understand that even though if you are an anomaly, you still get to choose. You get to choose, to fight till your death against that assumption, or live without hope. And as I’ve already told you how horrible it is to be without hope, you’d rather not choose the latter.
- And of course, there were some other takeaways that I consider personal. For example, this made me see clearly the difference between Advaita and Buddhism.
I would like to keep it personal because it seems to people as though I’m just spinning stories to boast myself or portray myself higher or special than others which of course is not my intent. I realized that first after I wrote the blog Advaita & Meditation when a person who I know asked sarcastically ” so, what you’re enlightened now?”. After that, of course, it didn’t stop me from writing, but I chose to separate my personal and general blogs.
Anyway, this blog was not trying to give you any conclusions to anything, all I’m trying to do is show my observations this week. I hope and wish your hope is and will be intact forever.
Thank You,
Yours Loving,
Sanath Kumar Naibhi
Love how you reflected through your tough times and shared the takeaways with us!